Spontaneous Combustion Should Be More of a Thing - Hoodie

Spontaneous Combustion Should Be More of a Thing
 

Some people meditate. Some hit the gym. You? You fantasize about vanishing in a ball of flame mid-conversation—because sometimes that’s just easier than explaining your schedule, your emotions, or why you didn’t reply to that email. This hoodie gets it.

Built for the chronically burned-out and occasionally flammable, this Unisex Heavy Blend™ Hoodie combines cozy fabric with a self-destructive sense of humor. Whether you're spiraling on the couch or ghosting an event in real time, it’s your go-to for keeping warm while mentally combusting.

Features:

• Roomy kangaroo pouch for your hands or regrets

• Drawstring hood to hide from the world

• Clean, seamless construction (unlike your coping strategies)

• Soft and durable—because something in your life should be

• Optional embroidery—because you deserve a little fire of your own

Care Instructions:

• Machine wash cold—like your heart

• Tumble dry medium, like your mood

• Low iron—unless you’re already hot enough

• No dry cleaning—this isn’t a blazer

• Non-chlorine bleach as needed, just like therapy

OFMITA

We Hate Everything – Especially the Human Condition.