Or: How We Barely Tolerate Your Data
Last Updated: July 2025
Effective Immediately (or whenever you read this, whichever comes first)

TL;DR Version

• We collect what we need.

• We don’t sell it.

• We don’t stalk you.

• We barely even want to look at it.

• But we have to—so you can get your damn shirt.

1. 🧠 What We Collect (Against Our Will)
When you buy from OFMITA, we collect basic info like:

• Your name (so we don’t mail your order to “Hey You”)

• Your email (for order updates & passive-aggressive shipping alerts)

• Your shipping address (so the package lands on your porch, not a neighbor’s goat barn)

• Your payment method (processed securely through a third party because we want zero liability)

• Your order history (so we can prove you did, in fact, buy that “Sorry I Spoke” tee)

We don’t collect anything weird or creepy.
We’re a T-shirt shop, not a data cult.


2. 🔐 How We Use It
We use your info to:

• Fulfill orders

• Send order updates

• Provide customer support (once Chris checks his inbox)

• Send marketing emails only if you opted in

• Track store performance (so we know which designs slap and which flop)

We do not use your data to:

• Sell it to brokers

• Create fake profiles

• Judge your Spotify playlists (unless they’re really bad)

3. 🔄 Third-Party Services
To keep OFMITA functioning, we use trusted partners for:

• Payment processing

• Printing & fulfillment

• Site hosting

• Shipping

They only get the info needed to do their jobs.
They’re contractually required to protect your data and not be weird with it.
If any of them get weird, SCRAP will shred their contracts and Chris will write an angry, typo-filled email.

4. 🛡️ Security Measures
We use standard security practices:

• Encrypted checkout

• Secure servers

• Restricted access

• Locked doors (physical and digital)

We also do not let Chris run software updates anymore.
Learning from mistakes is growth.
Still — nothing online is 100% invincible.
If something major happens, we’ll notify you per applicable laws, like responsible adults.

5. 🍪 Cookies & Tracking
(Not the Delicious Kind)
We use cookies to:

• Make the site work

• Remember your cart

• See when someone abandons “Dreams Are for Losers” at checkout

• Improve site performance

You can disable cookies in your browser.
The site may get weird.
You’ve been warned.

6. 📪 Marketing Emails (Optional… Mostly)
If you sign up—or recklessly leave the little box checked—we may send:

• New product drops

• Sales

• Snark

• Surprise sarcasm
   

You can unsubscribe anytime.
We won’t take it personally (but we will notice).

7. 🤷 Your Rights (Depending on Where You Live)
You may have the right to:

• Access your data

• Correct your info

• Request deletion

• Opt out of marketing

• File a complaint with your local authority

Email privacy@ofmita.com and we’ll respond within 30 days, barring iced-coffee-related catastrophes.

8. 🚸 Children
OFMITA is not intended for kids under 13 (or your country’s “please don’t sue” age).
If your child orders a “Get Bent” tee, that responsibility is fully, absolutely, and gloriously yours.
Contact us and we’ll fix it.

9. 🧬 Data Retention
We keep your info only as long as needed to:

• Complete your order

• Meet tax/legal obligations

• Prevent total organizational collapse
   

Want your data deleted after your order is done?
Ask us. Unless laws say otherwise, we’ll erase it — no breakup speech required.

10. 💬 Contact Us
Got questions or concerns?

📧 info@ofmita.com (for lost packages, teleportation errors, or shipping to other planets)

🔚 Final Notes from SCRAP & Chris
We don’t want your secrets.
We don’t want your drama.
We just want you to wear rude T-shirts and keep the storefront alive.
Thanks for your data.
Now go disappoint people in style.

🖤 OFMITA Apparel
We Hate Everything — Even You — Professionally.